Labour cabinet half time team talk

Alistair Darling has said that the Labour government is like a football team which has lost the will to fight. “We don’t look as if we have got fire in our bellies,” he says in an interview with the Observer. “We have got to come out fighting.”

Labour Party conference is the last big party meeting before the general election – half time if you will. I won’t be there. But if I could address the cabinet, this would be my message. And any coincidence with anything Rafa Benitez said at half time in Istanbul is entirely deliberate.

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In the bowels of the Brighton Centre, the cabinet is assembled. Ragged. Dishevelled. Abject despair prevails. They are tired after a long season. They are 3-0 down at half time against a rampant opposition. All the talk before the game of the opposing team being too old, past it, has not been realised. They may be old but the old tricks are working.

The manager clears his throat and starts to speak. But it’s not enough to stop the hostility starting to break out between some of the payers.

“It’s worse than you think”, he says. They stop, taken aback.

“We’re headed, you are headed, for an historic humiliation. And given the financial state of this club, we may just be 45 minutes away from the start of the end for a great institution. An historically bad performance. Some of you will be left here, having to clean it up. Some of you may get other offers. But you’ll be forever associated with failure.

But before the future, this day is not over. Events have yet to run their course. There’s a long way to go before the final whistle. And you’ve got to go out there again, in the worst possible circumstances, to face your fate. You can shirk and it will hurt more. Or you can stand up and show that you deserve to be here. That you stand as quality individuals. That you represent something greater than yourself: a collective with a proud history.

Because if you go out there and try to vanish, head down, you will be lonely at the end. Or you can go out tehre and work together, as a team, to stand up for your reputation, your history, your achievements so far and your ideasls for the future.

I don’t know if we can win. I don’t know if we can protect ourselves from humiliation. But I do know this: we got here as a team. Playing for each other, for sure. But also as custodians of something much greater. The hopes, aspirations, dreams of a community who depend on you to do what they can not. Yes, they’re grateful you got this far. But it will pale into insignifcance against the worst defeat in history – the betrayal of what you gave away.

So, this is what we do next.

Gordon, the goalie: your distribution needs to be quicker. Don’t charge off your line and get caught out. Don’t worry about the fumbles in the first half, just catch the next one. Make yourself big. Narrow the target in one on ones.

Cruddas, left back: If you’re going to get forward your final ball has to better. Don’t get caught out of position. And make sure you’re covered defensively.

Miliband (D), right back: You need to get forward more. You’re not up against a substantial player. And when you’re in a position to make a telling contribution, don’t spend too long thinking about it.

Straw, Darling, centrebacks: Stay strong in the tackle. Be decisive on the air. Don’t get pulled out of position.

Denham, defensive midfielder: Every team needs a water carrier. You need to be bigger. You are on the national stage now. You’ve broken into the first team because you are good enougih. Now play like it.

Balls, midfielder: You are drifting out wide too much. Cut out the fancy tricks. Stop playing your own game and get stuck into the team. You were an integral part of how we got this far.Remember your role and your major strengths and provide more cover for the keeper and the back four.

Mandelson, attacking midfielder: You can’t be everywhere. You’ve got to galvanise others by doing the best you canĀ  – not playing as many roles as you can. And when the ball drops to you, make sure you are there to make the pass or take the shot.

Harman, playing off the front man: You’ve got a role in attack and defence. Don’t get ahead of the play. Hold your position and pick the final pass.

Burnham, Johnson, wingers: I’m aware that you’re both playing out of position. You’ve got the energy, so use it. You’ve got tremendous strength cutting inside. We need you to hold the ball up and when you get a clear cut opportunity – take it.

Blunkett, sub: I know you are desparate to get on. Remember: being associated with a winning team brings rewards of its own. IF your chance comes, take it.

Now you are ready. Don’t think about the bigger picture. Just do the next thing well. Win the next tackle. Pass the ball. Keep the ball. And when you lose posession, re-group and work as a team to close them down and win it back. And if you do this, you won’t conceded the next goal. So you’ll be in with a chance. And I know that you – my team – only need one chance. Score a goal and everything changes.

And win or lose, you will have done it together. On this day, you’ll have reminded people what you are. You’ll have shown people that on this day, a team of people worked together for a greater cause. And if you do this today, there will be a future – thanks to you. The dream will live on.

So go out there and do the next thing well. You can control your destiny.

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